How To Access Your Inner Wisdom
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It never ceases to amaze me the great capacity and capability humans have. We have significantly advanced in every field. When one of my friends was born, TV was not yet invented. By the time she died, we had video calls via Skype… on a mobile device! We produced a vaccine for Covid in a year or so when the norm was several years before a vaccine could be used.
And yet we allow our inner blocks to limit us much more than external obstacles. We tell ourselves ‘I don’t know’ or ‘I can’t’ many more times than ‘I will figure it out’ or ‘Maybe I can try X’.
We sabotage ourselves even before starting. We use a wide range of excuses going from ‘I do not have time’, ‘There is no way I will ever do what she does’, ‘What will my family and friends think of me?’ We minimize ourselves instead of taking space and bestowing our amazing gifts.
One of the theories I have is that to belong to the tribe (and survive) we cannot be the exception – hence the minimizing. And in order to ‘keep us in line’ and to not deviate from the tribe, our mind invented inner blocks including limiting beliefs and inner critics.Â
One of the things I love the most about being a coach is to show my clients the number of choices they have for each event or circumstance. When I ask a thoughtful question – those that make us pause to search for the answer – I can immediately see their expressions of ‘wait, what? I have a choice? I don’t have to put up with this?’
As I continue to exercise my self-awareness, I love seeing how each event in my life is perfectly aligned with what I need to learn, see, or realize at a specific moment.
So, how can we access our inner wisdom?
1) Gratitude
Gratitude has magical powers. It reprograms our brain from perceiving the threat first to seeing the positive and divine order in life. Since two thoughts cannot exist simultaneously, in the moment we are expressing gratitude, there is no space for catabolic thoughts.
Every day we can decide what to focus on. Do we see an ugly body in front of the mirror, or do we see an amazing one that has stuck with us in sickness and in health? Do we dread having yet another meeting or are we excited to discuss a topic with our colleagues? Am I annoyed with my partner’s morning quirks or do I laugh a little because secretly they make me happy?
2) See yourself without the baggage
We tell ourselves many stories usually about why we are so imperfect, inadequate, or weird (not in a good way). It can start with a seemingly innocent comment about our first wrinkle to later unfold in how we are too old to start or learn anything new.
As soon as you notice yourself going down the rabbit hole, stop, take a deep breath, and start with the facts. Make a list of the things you have accomplished. Say aloud your excellent personality traits. See yourself the way your best friend, significant other, parent would see you.
Use this information to have the internal dialogue with your mind and show the evidence of how amazing you are. It can go something like this:
Mind: That job is too high for you; you are not ready.
You: Let’s see. The requirements are asking for 10 years of experience, check; expertise in building relationships, check. And I have examples. Want to hear them?
Mind: I don’t think you do. Let’s hear what you have.
You: I am sure you remember when I started my last job two years ago. As the newest person in the team, I took the time and initiative to meet my key stakeholders. I gained their trust by keeping my commitments and not holding information from them. Even Patty, who was not warm to me when I joined, became a close partner.
Mind: (defeated) I got nothing…
3) Embrace your uniqueness
Many years ago, I read a funny phrase describing teenagers: they all want to be different by looking like everyone else. We shed only some of that desire, to be like everyone else, as we become adults.
I have been in and out of the trap of unique = create something new all the time. When I started to write, I thought I would run out of content in a few weeks. Then I realized that a big part of my uniqueness is how I digest, curate, and articulate information.
We do not need to create something completely new. Most of the times, we will take known elements and re-arrange them in a different manner. That in itself is unique. The same goes with the energy and vibration we bring to others, our careers, family, and life in general.
Let us make a conscious effort to stay away from the words perfect or perfection. First, it creates a lot of pressure, and, for me, it is associated with insecurity. Second, perfection is always in relation to something else. How could we define the perfect chocolate cake? Or the perfect person for someone else? The same goes for defects. When we say a car is defective, for example, it is in relation to what we expect a car to do.
4) Engage a coach
It is difficult to be your own coach. Even with all the tools I have learned and interactions with clients I have had, I can mostly manage my self-talk. After all, I come with my own set of filters.
For us to grow, we want to have input from a different perspective. This will come in the shape of a coach, therapist, and/or books or articles from experts. The same goes for communities (virtual, in person, religious, non-religious, etc.), trusted friends or family members, and co-workers. This is the power of the tribe.
When I engage with my coach or therapist, they will make an observation about what I am saying or ask me a question I did not think of before. This new input will spark other ideas that I can reflect on, modify, and later execute if I choose to do so.
“Become aware that you already possess all the inner wisdom, strength, and creativity needed to make your dreams come true.” Sarah Ban Breathnach, author
We are superb beings far greater and wiser than we give ourselves credit for. Be mindful of your inner dialogue and the stories you tell yourself. Show the evidence of your incredible self and question your inner critic’s messages.
As you vibrate in a higher frequency you will inevitably change tribes. It may feel lonely for a while, but I promise you will find your new people soon enough. The world wants and needs your gifts, talent, wisdom, and perspective. Those who are ready to receive them cannot wait to cross your path.
What do you do to access your inner wisdom? Please, let us know in the comments.
As a leadership coach, I enable talent to achieve bold goals with high standards. My mission is to help underrepresented women in the financial industry transition from mid to senior level leadership positions by creating awareness, increasing emotional intelligence, and unveiling the tools and choices available to them.