How To Overcome Our Fear of Success
I have a theory that we are equally afraid (if not more) of achieving and of not achieving our dreams. I think it has to do with the fear of the unknown: how would our lives be different if we have or do what we want? How much power do I really have? Would I use that drive responsibly? How vulnerable would I become? Do I deserve it (realizing my dreams)?
Because of our fear of actually getting what we want, we may sabotage, procrastinate, and activate our gremlin to keep us from our goal. Think about your dream job, or attaining financial freedom, or your health goals.
There is more than enough information everywhere with the tools, strategy, and methods we can use. And what do we do with that information? We lawyer up and rebute each idea. ‘I don’t have experience in that field’, ‘nobody will hire a 50+ year old white man’. ‘Only rich people get to be financially free’. ‘I don’t read’. ‘I don’t like going to the gym’. You get the gist.
So we are in a constant battle with ourselves, the ‘system’, and our ‘bad luck’. We keep making the same goals, executing (or not) the same strategy, and making excuses.
” Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our Light, not our Darkness, that most frighten us.” Unknown
The good news is that we can take a deep breath, overcome our ‘fear of success’ and actually achieve our objectives. It takes consistent action that compound in time, drive, and commitment.
1) Start with why
Why do I want a different job, or be financially free, or lose weight? Maybe you want to spend more time with your family, or create a bigger impact on other people, or improve your community.
Those reasons are the ones that will help refuel your drive when the inevitable obstacles ‘show up’. Your why has to be yours and not the expectations of other people (including family) of you.
2) Learn from the best
This is where we have to tune out well intended advice from people with great intentions and no experience. Start reading, listening to, and following people and companies that are aligned and have the expertise in the area you are pursuing.
This newly acquired knowledge will help you with the next step of creating a strategy.
3) Create a strategy
Yes, strategy works in our personal life as well. Consider what tools and methods you will use, how you will incorporate them in your everyday life, and how you will overcome setbacks.
When I was going through my weight loss process, I planned every meal of every day. I knew my limitations and if I didn’t have the appropriate food at the ready I could easily slip back to unhealthy habits.
The good news is that there is a lot of information out there on any subject we want to pursue. And, there are many ways to pilot a strategy and see if it works for you.
4) Change your story
We all have a story we tell ourselves to explain why we can’t. These are also known as internal blocks.Â
We have the ability to change our inner blocks into something productive that work to our advantage and to propel us towards our goal.
“Because success is heavy, carries a responsibility with it, it is much easier to to procrastinate and live on the ‘someday I’ll’ philosophy.” Unknown
Great leaders take ownership and accountability of their destiny. They know there is no such thing as an ‘overnight success’. Amazing leaders provide the tools and knowledge to their teams so they can also overcome their fear and move towards their own dreams. This is what creates teams that innovate, collaborate, and have better productivity ratings.
In the comments, share your ‘why’ and/or strategies to achieve your goals and dreams; I would love to know more. You can write your comments in English, Spanish, Portuguese, or French.
My mission is to help women transform their inner voice from critic and withholder to champion and enabler, so they can confidently realize and fulfill their potential achieving what they want most for themselves, their families, communities, organizations, and teams.